Monsters (Dogs of War, Ch.1)

You can't stop what has begun
Signed, sealed, they deliver oblivion
We all have a dark side, to say the least
And dealing in death is the nature of the beast—Pink Floyd, The Dogs of War

Elena smelled the cigarette smoke and smiled to herself. The ashtray was under the No Smoking sign in the hallway outside the lab, close enough to smell. Most people extinguished their smokes before that out of some paranoia that something would jump out of an Erlenmeyer flask to combust on the end of their cigarette, blowing them to smithereens.

Half the time, she wished they would. A woman’s lab was her castle.

Reno, on the other hand, feared nothing. In fact he seemed to view being blown up as just another exciting prospect, more entertainment to add to his day. She had a soft spot for the redhead, even if Tseng had called him a rabid ferret over coffee this morning. “What now, Reno?”

“Lanie, ‘sup? How’d you know it was me, yo?”

“Did you ever wonder why they don’t let you smoke in the field?”

Reno blinked at the apparent non sequitur. “What brings you down to the basement kingdom?” she tried again.

“Aw Lanie, all the pretty girls are in the lab!”

“Suckup. And since when are you looking for pretty girls?”

Reno started. Elena felt a little bad; when she turned around, sure enough Reno looked uncomfortable and guilty. “It’s no huge deal. You know the saying, no such thing as a straight Turk. At most we are all…unclassified.”

That was the best word he’d ever heard for it. “It’s not that. It’s just that…there’s somebody. Doesn’t know I exist. Well, not that way, anyway. And anyway, what’s this? What about you and Bossman?”

“Did you think we were virgins before we met? Gods Reno. Don’t change the subject. What makes you think Cloud doesn’t know you exist?”

The look on Reno’s face was comical. “Um, actually I came down to give you these. Bossman says they need to be done yesterday, something about those new monster sightings out past the old Midgar ruins. See if you can switch the dude over to decaf, yo.” He flowed onto a lab stool with a feline grace that made Elena ache with envy. Gay men could be such pretty, broken things, especially with heart on sleeve.

“Not on your life. Are you in love with him? Not Tseng, so don’t try to change the subject again. You are a lovesick man if I’ve ever seen one. Are you?”

“…..Yes. Do I stand a chance in hell?” For all the shit he gave her, he liked Elena. She was smart, funny, and had a knack for reading people.

“I’m not a fortune teller but I’ll give you what I know.” She gave up all pretense of working and sat down next to him. “I don’t work with him much more than you do besides the missions he’s done with us. But something funny about those missions; you know he does them on an individual contract basis?”

“Yeah, he said something about picking up some extra dough for a loft he wanted to buy?”

“Well so far he’s only accepted assignments that included you.”

Reno’s eyebrows rose.

“And being Tech Girl, I end up processing all the monitor feeds, right? He’s never out of line of sight from you. Don’t get me wrong, he’s covering the whole team like he’s supposed to do but you aren’t going to get a stubbed toe that he’s not going to kill who stubbed it.”

It made sense. Elena watched while Reno put the puzzle together. “If you want, I can keep my eyes open for anything else.”

“Why does ‘if you want’ always sound like a coffee deal to me?”

“The good stuff, not that gas station swill you and Rude drink. Or I’ll forget how to access the building’s security cameras to find out how many times he checks you out during the cocktail hour this Friday.”

Reno sighed. “Is there a waffle cookie upcharge for that?”

“Only if you score.”

Friday cocktail hours were Rufus ShinRa’s latest idea to liquor up his employees in an attempt to get to know them better, or more likely, fondle them in the elevator. The idea wasn’t enough to keep anyone away from free drinks though. Cloud and Reno wandered the room trying very hard to not look at each other while Elena accessed the room’s camera from her phone.

“I asked myself, what is my loveliest Turk doing out here on the balcony, hacking into the security system from her phone instead of socializing with her coworkers?” Tseng whispered into her neck.

“I am not hacking. I am lawfully using the passwords I was given in the service of my employment, but for purposes of my own creation. Stop that.” Tseng was doing something with his tongue that was probably illegal within city limits.

“I brought you a fresh drink.”

“All right, Reno wants to know how many times Cloud checks him out during the party. They have a thing for each other but neither is saying anything.”

“And you’re playing matchmaker. How sweet,” he said without sarcasm. “What is Reno paying you?”

“Coffee. And a cookie if he scores, one of those chocolate filled waffle ones. Don’t worry, your energy drink deal for priority files is still front and center.”

“Good, now come inside, we’ll make up a number.”

Elena gave Reno a thumbs up sign when she passed him.

Monday morning dawned clear and bright, and too damn early for Reno. Usually mornings didn’t bother him, but he hadn’t been sleeping well. Something about these new monster sightings had been bugging him. Something familiar; the pattern of attacks made sense and yet it didn’t. But there wasn’t a clear picture of the critters anywhere. Anyone who got close enough usually didn’t come away with a very good description. Frequently, they didn’t come away at all. He sat in the Turk meeting room and rubbed his eyes to stay awake, the super sweet coffee for once not really doing the trick, while Tseng showed a grainy film that someone had managed to take with their cell phone.

“And that is the best we have so far. Ah, Cloud, glad you could join us in time for the video. I apologize for the short notice, please have a seat.” Reno prayed that he would take the empty chair next to him; he was acting like a teenager and he knew it. He could practically hear Elena roll her eyes. His prayers were answered as the smaller blond slipped in next to him.

“What the blue ball fuck is that?” Cloud whispered to Reno, who was in mid shrug when Tseng spoke.

“And that, Mr. Strife, is the question we have all been asking. I was hoping that your travels around the region had exposed you to these creatures, that perhaps you had seen something we had not. I take it this is not the case?”

Reno snorted at his friend getting caught whispering in class. “No, I’ve never seen anything move like that. And it’s dangerous, I take it.”

“Very. Thank you for coming, anyway.” Cloud nodded. He didn’t like random monsters on the road any more than the Turks did. Tseng cut on the lights.

“Rough night?” Reno grinned at Cloud’s haggard appearance.

“No, good night. Morning is starting to suck. Don’t go out drinking with Vincent, he is better at it. Gods, I want to die.” The former Turk in question was also at the meeting, looking none the worse for wear. Apparently he was better at drinking than Cloud. He had the grace to look apologetic.

“I’ll give you a ride home and buy you coffee, how’s that?” Reno was annoyed, he was planning on making that offer himself. Still, he knew the two had been friends for years and only lightly grumbled when they left together.

“He doesn’t have anything going with Vince, you know.” Elena commented, when they had gone. “They’re thick as thieves, but not like that. Vince has someone else.”

Reno nodded, neither asking how Elena knew that nor admitting how happy he was to hear it.

Vincent parked near Cloud’s apartment and the two climbed the stairs. Cloud liked to call it his cheap gym membership, but there were days he’d kill for an elevator. This was one of them. He wasn’t kidding when he said he was hung over.

“Dammit, Vin, what I want to know is how we go through all this shit. Meteorfall, Geostigma, whatever else, and things just get back to whatever our fucked up lives consider normal, and now we get a brand new fucking monster? What is this, Gaia’s version of a practical joke?”

Vincent’s hand was on Cloud’s arm. “What I want to know is why the door of your apartment is already open.”

They entered quietly, Vincent pulling out a slim .45 caliber pistol. “Since when do you go for compacts?”

“Since Cerberus doesn’t fit in my pocket. Where’s the sword?”

Point taken. Vincent produced a small .380 for Cloud from somewhere about his person. “Thanks, mine was in the kitchen.” Vincent’s look spoke volumes. The truth be told, Cloud preferred swords because he was a shitty shot. But when there was something or someone in your apartment, a gun didn’t do much good in the kitchen drawer, nor a sword leaning against the nightstand. Cloud made a mental note of this.

The monster was fast, coming out at them from the darkness of the den. Vincent got two shots—the .45 was like a cannon in the enclosure of the hallway—and by some miracle outside the laws of physics Cloud hit its…arm? Upper leg? It smelled too, a sour smell of unwashed body, then bounded past them.

Something almost reptilian winged Cloud above the eyebrow with a sickening wet plop. He saw nothing from that eye at first. Vincent grabbed him. “It’s blood,” he shouted over the ringing in their ears. “Blink.” Cloud blinked and saw red, then another blink cleared his vision.

“There goes my renter’s insurance.”

Vincent accompanied him to Medical and tried to patch him up. “No. I want Reno.”

“Oh, for the love of Gaia, there has now been a sighting in the city, one was in your home. This is not the time to be playing patty fingers with your crush!”

Head aching and with a flowered kitchen towel full of his own blood, Cloud was not in a mood for this. Not even from Vincent. “This is not about…that’s not the point. Reno’s better at this than you are.” It was true, Reno had a reputation for neat, efficient first aid among the Turks. “Besides, I have something to go over with him before I bring it up with the rest of you.” Though the idea of patty fingers, whatever the hell that was, sounded appealing. Reno had nice hands.

And there was something about the way that monster moved that repulsed him. Not because of its foreignness, but because of its familiarity. He needed to talk to Reno, because Reno wouldn’t think he was crazy. Or, at least not any crazier than usual.

A throat clearing caught their attention. “Interrupting something?” Reno stood against the wall, riveted to their conversation. Vincent made an annoyed exit as Cloud prayed for the floor to swallow him whole.

Reno pulled the top half of his wild hair back and wheeled over a surgical tray to the table where Cloud sat, gently pulling away the dish towel. He grimaced.

“We have to stop meeting like this.” Cloud glanced up with his one eye. “Let me get you sewn up and you can tell me what the hell you and Dracula were shouting about earlier. Did you get a look at what did this?”

“No. It was dark; Vin and I took three good shots at it though. But it got me on the way out.”

“Hmmm, not too deep. Bled like a motherfucker though.” Reno cleaned and rinsed the cut, then stitched it neatly. “You’re getting like me with the scars. I hope they don’t think I’m beating you. What did you want to tell me?”

“This is going to sound crazy.”

“What hasn’t so far?” Cloud sagged in relief. A tiny part of his mind still feared that Reno would think he was a raving idiot.

“It felt, well when it hit me, it almost felt like I was sparring. Like I almost wasn’t surprised, in a way, the way it hit me. And it smelled like…”

Reno stood, looking at him expectantly, arms crossed.

“It smelled like B.O.”

“Weird. There’s a bunch of shit about these things that doesn’t make sense, that’s two to add to the collection. Now, what’s this about a crush?” Reno bandaged the injury, gently taping around the swelling. “No, tell me.”

“Why?”

Reno sponged at the dried blood on the rest of Cloud’s face. When he was done, he kissed him lightly. “Good enough answer?”

Cloud thought. Or tried to think. It was probably a really bad day to make a decision. He was tired. Hung over as fuck. His home had just been broken into. He’d just been beaten up by an unidentified monster. At some point, he was going to have to start treating all this with the gravity it deserved.

“I need a place to stay.”

They made a brief and paranoid stop back by Cloud’s apartment to pick up several changes of clothes, his laptop, every bladed weapon he owned, and the .357 plus extra ammunition that resided in his kitchen junk drawer. The last item drew a raised eyebrow from Reno but no comment.

“Reno, who knows where you live?”

“Name and address is in the ShinRa database, yo. Past that, everybody I owe money.” He garbled around a mouthful of home made pizza. Or, more accurately, home assembled, as Reno himself had pointed out. Store bought crust, jar sauce, pepperoni and cheese from a pouch did not a chef make but it would fill your stomach. “Why?”

“Just wondering. I don’t believe in coincidences anyway, and I sure as fuck don’t think it was an accident that lizard jackass was in my apartment. What’s the connection? ShinRa? Or is it something to do with the labs?”

Reno chewed thoughtfully and sipped his beer. After a moment he picked up the phone to call Tseng, using his free hand to peel back the bandage and check Cloud’s stitches. I wonder how normal couples get together, without reptilian mutants and dressing checks.

“OK, Bossman suggests we sleep in shifts. I’ll take first.” He didn’t bother keeping the irony from his voice. It wasn’t quite the plans either of them had for the evening

Cloud’s response was a dry chuckle. “You gonna eat that last piece?”

The next morning, Reno and Tseng stopped at the coffee bar downstairs for Tseng’s usual fix. Tseng stirred the foam into his drink and Reno stepped up. “Yo, I’ll take an extra large with a double espresso shot and four sugars, and a large premium blend, light cream. Oh, and uh, gimme one of those waffle cookies too, ‘k?”

Tseng didn’t even try to hide his grin on the way out of the shop.