Fucking FF-net is down again, has been for days. Won't let you post new chapters/stories. Fuckerballs.
So, guess I'll post the rest of my chapters here, for now.
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Rufus tossed and turned for hours after Kadaj's bombshell; a sleepless night was to be expected, after all, following such a revelation. Sighing, the president sat up in bed, and dangled his legs over the side, as he ran his hand through his hair, feeling flustered.
Perhaps I'd better check on Kadaj, he thought. He's probably not getting any sleep either. Creeping quietly down the hallway, Rufus nudged open the door to the guest bedroom, and frowned when he saw that the bed was unoccupied. He wouldn't have…left here in the middle of the night, would he? Rufus worried. He began to panic, feeling guilty for his cold reaction to the news of Kadaj's pregnancy. Anyone would have had the same reaction, surely, Rufus told himself. Still, he couldn't help but feel a bit culpable; if Kadaj had taken off – and, with his brothers making veiled threats against him – Rufus was concerned about his lover's safety.
He wandered out into the darkened living room, and breathed a sigh of relief as he saw Kadaj curled up on the couch, sleeping – although it seemed like anything but peaceful slumber. Kadaj twitched and murmured in his sleep, softly crying. It cut Rufus to the bone, to hear Kadaj's pain, even in his dreams. Quietly, Rufus gathered a throw blanket, and carefully draped it over Kadaj's sleeping form. It was as if Kadaj had been touched with a live wire; the minute the blanket touched his flesh, he shot up, and screamed.
"No! Please, no, don't take my baby!" Kadaj screamed, sobbing brokenly in his half-lucid state. Alarmed, Rufus wrapped his arms around Kadaj's quivering body. "Shh, Kadaj, it's okay," Rufus murmured, kissing the top of his lover's head. "I'm here, baby, I'm here." Kadaj fell backwards into Rufus's arms, in an exhausted heap. "Oh gods, Rufus," Kadaj cried, sniffling. "I…I had a bad dream."
"I gathered as much," Rufus said dryly. "Why are you out here, though, and not in the guest room?"
"Because," Kadaj replied bitterly, "I felt I had taken enough of your hospitality. I only intended to rest here for a bit, then…leave, hopefully before you even woke up."
"So," Rufus retorted, his suspicions confirmed, "you were going to just leave without a word, weren't you?"
He sighed, and frowned at Kadaj. "Honestly, Kadaj," he said firmly. "You need to think ahead a bit. Did you not tell me that your brothers were basically threatening you? Why would you leave here without telling me? I can…protect you from them, at least. Or my Turks can, anyway."
"I thought…" Kadaj replied hesitantly, sitting up and looking Rufus in the eye. "I thought you wanted nothing more to do with me."
"If I wanted nothing more to do with you," Rufus snapped, his eyes flashing angrily, "I wouldn't have offered you the guest bedroom, I would have simply thrown your ass out."
"Wait a minute," Kadaj interrupted, placing a hand on Rufus's arm. "You said your Turks can protect me? What do you mean by that?"
"I've assigned them already," Rufus replied, gently brushing a strand of hair out of Kadaj's eyes with his fingers. "Just…as a precautionary measure. Initially, I did so because of your…involvement with me. Kadaj, you have to understand – being with me can carry a certain risk in itself. I've made a lot of enemies…"
"So you have," Kadaj replied, sighing. "And I've made enemies out of my very own brothers." He laughed ironically. "It seems we are both walking targets, but for varying reasons."
"So we are," Rufus agreed. He paused, carefully weighing his next words. "Kadaj?" he began. "I…I still don't know what to think about…everything. The baby…it's just a lot—to process, to say the least…"
"I know, Rufus," Kadaj replied sadly, leaning back against the couch. "Trust me, I know. Don't you think this has been a bit difficult for me to wrap my mind around? One day, I find love where I least expected it; the next, I find I'm pregnant with his child." He choked back a sob.
"I'm sorry," Rufus whispered, putting an arm around Kadaj's shoulders. "I've been…insensitive."
"No, you haven't, Rufus," Kadaj replied, smiling. "Your reaction was…to be expected, really. You're in shock! As am I. My…head is spinning, not only because we made a child together, but…my pregnancy will be accelerated. I did not get a chance to tell you earlier, when you stormed off…"
"I really am an asshole," Rufus growled, pressing his lips against the back of Kadaj's hand. "Forgive me. But, tell me what you mean by…accelerated?"
"Well, according to Mo—Jenova, I mean," Kadaj corrected himself, frowning, "one week of my pregnancy will be equivalent to one month, in a normal human pregnancy."
Rufus gasped, as Kadaj's words registered their meaning with him. "That means the child will be born in…"
"In nine weeks," Kadaj replied, finishing Rufus's sentence for him.
"My gods," Rufus gasped. "Nine weeks until you're full term? Nine weeks until our son…or daughter…is born?"
"Yes," Kadaj said, sighing. "Nine weeks."
"Kadaj," Rufus said, as he stood up suddenly. "Come with me. Let's get some sleep…if we can. There's much more we have to discuss, but I'm exhausted. And I don't want you out here, all alone."
Nodding, Kadaj got up from the couch, and followed Rufus down the hall. "You're right…I am getting sleepy," he said, yawning. "I'll stay in here," he said, as he entered the guest bedroom.
Rufus stopped in his tracks, and spun on his heel. "No," he said quietly, cupping Kadaj's chin, and kissing him lightly. "I want you with me. Please."
Kadaj nodded silently, his eyes brimming with tears. "Of course," he whispered, hardly believing what he was hearing. He followed Rufus into the master suite, and silently sat down on the bed beside him.
"Do you need some pajamas?" Rufus asked Kadaj, suddenly noticing he was still in his day clothes.
"Sure, that'd be good," Kadaj replied, smiling warmly. "Thank you."
"It's not a problem," Rufus murmured. He opened up his armoire, and fished out a pair of sleep pants, along with a tank top. "This okay? I'm a bit taller than you…"
"Not by much," Kadaj interrupted, smirking. He quickly began undressing, completely unaware that Rufus was staring at him as he disrobed. Kadaj quickly changed into the pajama pants, and, as he started to put the tank top on, suddenly felt Rufus's stare.
"I'm sorry," Kadaj muttered, blushing. "I really should have changed in the bathroom or something—"
"You're—Kadaj," Rufus stammered, completely awe-stricken. "Your stomach. It's…showing already. You're showing."
"How is that possible?" Kadaj murmured, looking down at his abdomen and squinting. "I don't see anything."
"Right here," Rufus whispered, gliding his hand over Kadaj's stomach. He would swear later, that his heart stopped as he felt the telltale bump. "Oh gods, I can feel it…I can feel the slightest…something…movement?"
Kadaj was on the verge of tears as he quietly placed his hand over Rufus's. "I feel her heart beating in time with mine…I feel it inside, Rufus…"
"Her? You think it's a girl?" Rufus murmured, smiling sadly.
It's all so real now," Rufus continued, his lip trembling. "Kadaj?" he began wearily. "I don't know what tomorrow may bring…but I want you to know this much: I will never hurt you. I will never hurt you, or our child…as long as there is breath in my body, I will protect you." A stunned Kadaj stared at Rufus, disbelieving for a moment; then, he broke down weeping, laying his head on Rufus's shoulder, as they lay together in bed.
"And I will love you, Kadaj," Rufus murmured, kissing Kadaj's tears. "I will always love you. Gods help me, but I cannot stop loving you."
"Rufus," Kadaj whispered tearfully, touching his cheek. "I don't even deserve your love…but I thank Gaia that you do love me. I love you too, Rufus…and I just hope you can forgive me..." Forgive me for…everything, even the things you don't know….
"Forgive you for what?" Rufus asked, sounding surprised. "You've done nothing wrong, Kadaj…as you said, Jenova lied to you your entire life. You are not to blame for this...you didn't know it was possible."
Kadaj felt himself wincing at Rufus's words, since he knew they were untrue. He said a silent prayer that Rufus would never find out the complete truth—that it was all Jenova's plan, for Rufus to impregnate Kadaj.
He must never find out, Kadaj vowed silently. Never. I cannot hurt him that way.
Back at headquarters, Reno and Rude were reviewing security tapes and audio, part of their regular duties. Reno, having been head of security for ShinRa for many years, was able to quickly sift through hours of such data, and focus on certain key words and phrases that might be deemed 'suspicious.' It was also a matter of practice, that any space Rufus ShinRa occupied, was bugged. Rufus was well aware that every word he uttered was monitored, but only his Turks had access to the audio. Healen, the President's office, his penthouse...even his limo - all of these had listening devices secreted away.
Reno had listened in on Rufus's trysts before; not in a voyeuristic fashion, but simply to determine if anyone who'd made it into the President's bed, had ulterior motives. It was easy to determine, without having to listen to absolutely everything. The Turk was seasoned enough where he could 'read' someone's intentions toward the president quite easily. It was boring work to Reno - boring but necessary. Half of his mind was on the whiskey he knew he'd be having later on, at Seventh Heaven, when he and Rude had finished reviewing security footage.
However, the audio he'd been going over - the president's conversations with Kadaj at his penthouse - made him take pause. He thought it might be wise to have Rude listen in, certain he must have misheard something. "Yo, partner," Reno called to Rude. "Listen to this, man. Did I just hear what I thought I heard?" He took off his headphones, and placed them over Rude's bald head.
Rude snorted. "And what do you think you heard, Reno?" he asked, bemused.
"This," Reno said, as he cued up the audio portion on his laptop. He played the audio, and watched Rude react as he listened. The only indication that Rude thought there was something unusual about what he was hearing, was a single raised eyebrow.
It was enough for Reno. "So, that surprised you too, huh Rude?" he asked his partner, as Rude removed the headphones.
"Yeah," Rude replied quietly. "Gods. Rufus a father? We'll have our work cut out for us now, you know."
"That's not the only thing that concerns me," Reno muttered. "Yeah, the president having an heir - obviously, that is huge, and we're probably gonna need to recruit more Turks. I'll talk to Tseng about that later."
"No," Reno continued, seriously. "This is all too shady to me. They slept together once, and bam - Kadaj is pregnant? And, conveniently, he didn't know he could...get pregnant?"
"Well," Rude offered. "All it takes is...one time, you know."
Reno chuckled. "I know that, partner," he replied, shutting down his laptop, and placing it in a locked cabinet. "I just can't shake this feeling that Kadaj is up to something. I'm not saying his...feelings, or whatever, for Rufus aren't genuine. But dude, the connection to Jenova? I just can't trust him, yo."
"I don't trust anybody," Rude growled.
"Ha!" Reno laughed. "You trust me, Rude. And Tifa..."
Rude raised an eyebrow again at the mention of Tifa. "And? Your point is?"
"My point is," Reno replied, clapping a hand on Rude's back, "that it's time to blow this popsicle stand and go to Seventh Heaven for a few rounds. Maybe you'll even work up the courage to ask Tifa out this time?"
"Fuck you," Rude muttered, adjusting his sunglasses, as he shut off the lights, and locked the office door behind him. Reno chuckled, but his laughter belied the uneasy feeling he still had about Kadaj.
Definitely going to get to the bottom of this, Reno thought, as he and Rude left headquarters, heading for Seventh Heaven. Somehow, Rude and I will figure out who Kadaj is, where he came from, and what he's really up to.
Perhaps I'd better check on Kadaj, he thought. He's probably not getting any sleep either. Creeping quietly down the hallway, Rufus nudged open the door to the guest bedroom, and frowned when he saw that the bed was unoccupied. He wouldn't have…left here in the middle of the night, would he? Rufus worried. He began to panic, feeling guilty for his cold reaction to the news of Kadaj's pregnancy. Anyone would have had the same reaction, surely, Rufus told himself. Still, he couldn't help but feel a bit culpable; if Kadaj had taken off – and, with his brothers making veiled threats against him – Rufus was concerned about his lover's safety.
He wandered out into the darkened living room, and breathed a sigh of relief as he saw Kadaj curled up on the couch, sleeping – although it seemed like anything but peaceful slumber. Kadaj twitched and murmured in his sleep, softly crying. It cut Rufus to the bone, to hear Kadaj's pain, even in his dreams. Quietly, Rufus gathered a throw blanket, and carefully draped it over Kadaj's sleeping form. It was as if Kadaj had been touched with a live wire; the minute the blanket touched his flesh, he shot up, and screamed.
"No! Please, no, don't take my baby!" Kadaj screamed, sobbing brokenly in his half-lucid state. Alarmed, Rufus wrapped his arms around Kadaj's quivering body. "Shh, Kadaj, it's okay," Rufus murmured, kissing the top of his lover's head. "I'm here, baby, I'm here." Kadaj fell backwards into Rufus's arms, in an exhausted heap. "Oh gods, Rufus," Kadaj cried, sniffling. "I…I had a bad dream."
"I gathered as much," Rufus said dryly. "Why are you out here, though, and not in the guest room?"
"Because," Kadaj replied bitterly, "I felt I had taken enough of your hospitality. I only intended to rest here for a bit, then…leave, hopefully before you even woke up."
"So," Rufus retorted, his suspicions confirmed, "you were going to just leave without a word, weren't you?"
He sighed, and frowned at Kadaj. "Honestly, Kadaj," he said firmly. "You need to think ahead a bit. Did you not tell me that your brothers were basically threatening you? Why would you leave here without telling me? I can…protect you from them, at least. Or my Turks can, anyway."
"I thought…" Kadaj replied hesitantly, sitting up and looking Rufus in the eye. "I thought you wanted nothing more to do with me."
"If I wanted nothing more to do with you," Rufus snapped, his eyes flashing angrily, "I wouldn't have offered you the guest bedroom, I would have simply thrown your ass out."
"Wait a minute," Kadaj interrupted, placing a hand on Rufus's arm. "You said your Turks can protect me? What do you mean by that?"
"I've assigned them already," Rufus replied, gently brushing a strand of hair out of Kadaj's eyes with his fingers. "Just…as a precautionary measure. Initially, I did so because of your…involvement with me. Kadaj, you have to understand – being with me can carry a certain risk in itself. I've made a lot of enemies…"
"So you have," Kadaj replied, sighing. "And I've made enemies out of my very own brothers." He laughed ironically. "It seems we are both walking targets, but for varying reasons."
"So we are," Rufus agreed. He paused, carefully weighing his next words. "Kadaj?" he began. "I…I still don't know what to think about…everything. The baby…it's just a lot—to process, to say the least…"
"I know, Rufus," Kadaj replied sadly, leaning back against the couch. "Trust me, I know. Don't you think this has been a bit difficult for me to wrap my mind around? One day, I find love where I least expected it; the next, I find I'm pregnant with his child." He choked back a sob.
"I'm sorry," Rufus whispered, putting an arm around Kadaj's shoulders. "I've been…insensitive."
"No, you haven't, Rufus," Kadaj replied, smiling. "Your reaction was…to be expected, really. You're in shock! As am I. My…head is spinning, not only because we made a child together, but…my pregnancy will be accelerated. I did not get a chance to tell you earlier, when you stormed off…"
"I really am an asshole," Rufus growled, pressing his lips against the back of Kadaj's hand. "Forgive me. But, tell me what you mean by…accelerated?"
"Well, according to Mo—Jenova, I mean," Kadaj corrected himself, frowning, "one week of my pregnancy will be equivalent to one month, in a normal human pregnancy."
Rufus gasped, as Kadaj's words registered their meaning with him. "That means the child will be born in…"
"In nine weeks," Kadaj replied, finishing Rufus's sentence for him.
"My gods," Rufus gasped. "Nine weeks until you're full term? Nine weeks until our son…or daughter…is born?"
"Yes," Kadaj said, sighing. "Nine weeks."
"Kadaj," Rufus said, as he stood up suddenly. "Come with me. Let's get some sleep…if we can. There's much more we have to discuss, but I'm exhausted. And I don't want you out here, all alone."
Nodding, Kadaj got up from the couch, and followed Rufus down the hall. "You're right…I am getting sleepy," he said, yawning. "I'll stay in here," he said, as he entered the guest bedroom.
Rufus stopped in his tracks, and spun on his heel. "No," he said quietly, cupping Kadaj's chin, and kissing him lightly. "I want you with me. Please."
Kadaj nodded silently, his eyes brimming with tears. "Of course," he whispered, hardly believing what he was hearing. He followed Rufus into the master suite, and silently sat down on the bed beside him.
"Do you need some pajamas?" Rufus asked Kadaj, suddenly noticing he was still in his day clothes.
"Sure, that'd be good," Kadaj replied, smiling warmly. "Thank you."
"It's not a problem," Rufus murmured. He opened up his armoire, and fished out a pair of sleep pants, along with a tank top. "This okay? I'm a bit taller than you…"
"Not by much," Kadaj interrupted, smirking. He quickly began undressing, completely unaware that Rufus was staring at him as he disrobed. Kadaj quickly changed into the pajama pants, and, as he started to put the tank top on, suddenly felt Rufus's stare.
"I'm sorry," Kadaj muttered, blushing. "I really should have changed in the bathroom or something—"
"You're—Kadaj," Rufus stammered, completely awe-stricken. "Your stomach. It's…showing already. You're showing."
"How is that possible?" Kadaj murmured, looking down at his abdomen and squinting. "I don't see anything."
"Right here," Rufus whispered, gliding his hand over Kadaj's stomach. He would swear later, that his heart stopped as he felt the telltale bump. "Oh gods, I can feel it…I can feel the slightest…something…movement?"
Kadaj was on the verge of tears as he quietly placed his hand over Rufus's. "I feel her heart beating in time with mine…I feel it inside, Rufus…"
"Her? You think it's a girl?" Rufus murmured, smiling sadly.
It's all so real now," Rufus continued, his lip trembling. "Kadaj?" he began wearily. "I don't know what tomorrow may bring…but I want you to know this much: I will never hurt you. I will never hurt you, or our child…as long as there is breath in my body, I will protect you." A stunned Kadaj stared at Rufus, disbelieving for a moment; then, he broke down weeping, laying his head on Rufus's shoulder, as they lay together in bed.
"And I will love you, Kadaj," Rufus murmured, kissing Kadaj's tears. "I will always love you. Gods help me, but I cannot stop loving you."
"Rufus," Kadaj whispered tearfully, touching his cheek. "I don't even deserve your love…but I thank Gaia that you do love me. I love you too, Rufus…and I just hope you can forgive me..." Forgive me for…everything, even the things you don't know….
"Forgive you for what?" Rufus asked, sounding surprised. "You've done nothing wrong, Kadaj…as you said, Jenova lied to you your entire life. You are not to blame for this...you didn't know it was possible."
Kadaj felt himself wincing at Rufus's words, since he knew they were untrue. He said a silent prayer that Rufus would never find out the complete truth—that it was all Jenova's plan, for Rufus to impregnate Kadaj.
He must never find out, Kadaj vowed silently. Never. I cannot hurt him that way.
Back at headquarters, Reno and Rude were reviewing security tapes and audio, part of their regular duties. Reno, having been head of security for ShinRa for many years, was able to quickly sift through hours of such data, and focus on certain key words and phrases that might be deemed 'suspicious.' It was also a matter of practice, that any space Rufus ShinRa occupied, was bugged. Rufus was well aware that every word he uttered was monitored, but only his Turks had access to the audio. Healen, the President's office, his penthouse...even his limo - all of these had listening devices secreted away.
Reno had listened in on Rufus's trysts before; not in a voyeuristic fashion, but simply to determine if anyone who'd made it into the President's bed, had ulterior motives. It was easy to determine, without having to listen to absolutely everything. The Turk was seasoned enough where he could 'read' someone's intentions toward the president quite easily. It was boring work to Reno - boring but necessary. Half of his mind was on the whiskey he knew he'd be having later on, at Seventh Heaven, when he and Rude had finished reviewing security footage.
However, the audio he'd been going over - the president's conversations with Kadaj at his penthouse - made him take pause. He thought it might be wise to have Rude listen in, certain he must have misheard something. "Yo, partner," Reno called to Rude. "Listen to this, man. Did I just hear what I thought I heard?" He took off his headphones, and placed them over Rude's bald head.
Rude snorted. "And what do you think you heard, Reno?" he asked, bemused.
"This," Reno said, as he cued up the audio portion on his laptop. He played the audio, and watched Rude react as he listened. The only indication that Rude thought there was something unusual about what he was hearing, was a single raised eyebrow.
It was enough for Reno. "So, that surprised you too, huh Rude?" he asked his partner, as Rude removed the headphones.
"Yeah," Rude replied quietly. "Gods. Rufus a father? We'll have our work cut out for us now, you know."
"That's not the only thing that concerns me," Reno muttered. "Yeah, the president having an heir - obviously, that is huge, and we're probably gonna need to recruit more Turks. I'll talk to Tseng about that later."
"No," Reno continued, seriously. "This is all too shady to me. They slept together once, and bam - Kadaj is pregnant? And, conveniently, he didn't know he could...get pregnant?"
"Well," Rude offered. "All it takes is...one time, you know."
Reno chuckled. "I know that, partner," he replied, shutting down his laptop, and placing it in a locked cabinet. "I just can't shake this feeling that Kadaj is up to something. I'm not saying his...feelings, or whatever, for Rufus aren't genuine. But dude, the connection to Jenova? I just can't trust him, yo."
"I don't trust anybody," Rude growled.
"Ha!" Reno laughed. "You trust me, Rude. And Tifa..."
Rude raised an eyebrow again at the mention of Tifa. "And? Your point is?"
"My point is," Reno replied, clapping a hand on Rude's back, "that it's time to blow this popsicle stand and go to Seventh Heaven for a few rounds. Maybe you'll even work up the courage to ask Tifa out this time?"
"Fuck you," Rude muttered, adjusting his sunglasses, as he shut off the lights, and locked the office door behind him. Reno chuckled, but his laughter belied the uneasy feeling he still had about Kadaj.
Definitely going to get to the bottom of this, Reno thought, as he and Rude left headquarters, heading for Seventh Heaven. Somehow, Rude and I will figure out who Kadaj is, where he came from, and what he's really up to.
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